Depression, Anxiety

[DFB FGXR6]

Today's coping strategy.





Just me, the cars and a podcast or two on the headphones. Spent over 4 hours immersed in detailing today. It's something I very much look forward to each week and helps me keep going. Sometimes the podcasts in ears make me laugh, sometimes they inform. The point is, I'm occupied in doing and listening to something that I love, keeping the mind and body active is the key.

[buggerlugs]

Originally Posted by DFB FGXR6

Today's coping strategy.

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Just me, the cars and a podcast or two on the headphones. Spent over 4 hours immersed in detailing today. It's something I very much look forward to each week and helps me keep going. Sometimes the podcasts in ears make me laugh, sometimes they inform. The point is, I'm occupied in doing and listening to something that I love, keeping the mind and body active is the key.

And you also have a great looking car........

[mondeomatureguy]

Hi Guys,
First off great car DFB FGXR6.
A long time ago I was a driver for a major department store In Sydney and where taking in the 1990s.

I had been there about 7 years and working with the lady's day in and day out you get to know your work mates well.
There was a lady that worked there who was going thru a very bad divorce and we talked a few times about it over lunch.

At the time I was living in Penrith and she was living near Rooty Hill. At 1am on a Saturday morning she phoned me crying and was going to do her self in.
I managed to calm her down on the phone and by that time I was wide awake.

I told her to put the kettle on because I am coming over. I got there about 1.30am she had been drinking. I made her a Coffee and one for myself and just let her talk and I listened.

At 4.30am we were still talking, she had a laugh, a cry and she told me "it was so good to have somebody to listen to me.
I had breakfast with her at 6am made sure she was ok and she went to bed and when she woke up she gave me a call to say she was " all good and feeling better".

It doesn't matter what you suffer from be it Depression, Anxiety or what ever.
If you have a friend with a good ear to listen to you or have a chat with I helps so much.

[sneaky]

I had balanced weekend.

Saturday was spent assisting my brother build his new shed (20m x 8m). Couldn't see much difference between the start and end of the day, most of the work was strengthening the frame that was put up the week before.

Sunday was then spent on the lounge watching netflix thinking about the stuff I should have been doing at my place.


I wonder at what point do I recognise that the meds are working and perhaps I'm just lazy

[blueoval]

Struggle city today. Got bad news overnight that my dads twin brother passed away from similar circumstances as my dad.

It marks his passing only 4months and 1 week after dad passed away.

My uncle was a talented and well loved man. I looked up to him and his kindness.

First my dad in April, now my Uncle in August. I hope this nightmare of a year ends and ends fast.

[whitelion65]

Condolences Blueoval. Always hard to lose a loved one.
A great thought that someone told me, was the pain we feel when losing a loved one, is we still have so much love for them in our hearts, and now that love can't get out!

I'm having an absolute shyte time at work at the moment. Been monitoring my blood pressure, and it's gone through the roof. I feel like I'm walking around with a "Kick me" sign on my back.
Had a meeting with the next two layers of my management team, and I've got to say, I haven't been so disappointed in a long time.
My mantra is, if you've got a team, then look after them!!

Three hours to go, and I'm outa here!!

Look after yourselves AND EACH OTHER FOLKS.

Hopefu;lly be on line again soon.

[.:4:.]

Everything has been getting a bit on top of me lately. Employment, well that is what it is. Trying to settle my late dads estate, i had to go full legal, and they for whatever reason need all my financials so its like they are putting my testicles into a paper shredder. And to top things off, one of my bordering properties refuse to do either anything about their overgrown back yard, or come to the party to replace the fence their overgrowth had startet to push over. I did complain to the council, so have others, but they are powerless. I also complained to the council about the big glorious gum tree that has big branches that extend over my house. So have my neighbours. A limb flattened the shed of my neighbor a few months back. I did them the nice thing and helped out. Well, a few nights ago one over my house fell. It missed my house. Sort of. It hit the outside unit for my A/c and flattened the fence. Initially i didnt do anything. Me+angry+chainsaw=probably not good. I got a mate to help with the carnage and prop the fence up the next day. But i seriously cannot cut a break at the moment.

[gooseneck]

This might not work for you.

Just don't give them the opportunity. Stay inside your house and keep taking Vitamin D tablets, play video games, socialize with family, watch tv shows, and pop lexapro. That is how I deal with neighbors.

There is zero reason why you need to ever talk or socialize with any of your neighbours. Get a proxy person to talk with them about matters that need talking about and never verbally speak to them directly. Hire a gardener to mow the lawn, don't do it yourself. If a tree needs felling then pay the money and get someone else to do it, someone who isn't emotionally involved in property damage.

And if you are forced into talking to a neighbour, use a tape recorder when you are. That way when they swear at you you can use it against them in court.

I'm going to soon be putting up privacy screens too, made from sheet metal to prevent theft and looters. The neighbors around here will steal something from you then tell everyone in the street that you're a bad person for going after them with the police.

I only ever talk to my friends. Being friends with neighbors is ****ed beyond comprehension because they take everything you say out of context and use it against you to appease the neighbor who hates your guts because she's a ****ing psycho bitch and won't admit it.

[.:4:.]

I get along well with all my bordering neighbors bar the old incoherent bastard who has the overgrown property with the big old gum tree. One of my beast mates mum lives next door to me, and thats how we became mates in the first place. The old bastard who everyone hates, his house is for sale, and i really hope it sells so all the prior complaints can get sorted.
When the other limb flattened my neighbors shed, i heard the bang then yelling in im not sure if it was manderin or cantonese, i dont speak either, but it was an over the fence yell of do you want a hand. I couldnt fix the shed, but i could get rid of the giant limb off the tree on the now flat packed shed. Not to be racist, but for some reason once done there was some confusion when i refused any cash payment. It just what you do. But, these neighbors had also complained about both the state of the ild bastards yard, the tree, the old cars in the yard, the frogs who habbitate his pool and now they have property damage.
The limb that fell my way was just another kick in the pants i didnt really need.

[CoupeKing]

[.:4:.]

I had calmed my farm a bit with the legal business. So had time to process things and get over more or less having my testicles run through a paper shredder over financials and that stuff. Im making the claim, its nothing against myself, but my legal people need full disclosure.
And i have been fully honest.
What stressed me out today was. My legal peoples know im peaking about this business. So they booked a meeting and requested my mum attend just to calm my farm. Thats fine. Ive been asked about disabilities or special needs before, my answer is no.
Mum bought up something that doesnt even cross my mind and nobody ever has noticed. And that just ruined my day. My legal people are all hooray, special needs etc. Im able bodied, have worked in a trade for 14 years that requires coordination and fine motor skills. And i have cerebral palsy. So not a thing really. Its not my brain works but doesnt communicate with my body, its minor. So i just dont feel much pain. Everything else is good.
I dont anything about cerebral palsy, have never needed to. Ive always been fine.
Being hyped up and being treated like 'special needs'. Get absolutely ****ed.
It really does my head in.
Im not disabled in the slightest.

[gooseneck]

Life is beyond ****ed.

[.:4:.]

Originally Posted by gooseneck

Life is beyond ****ed.

Just remeber there is always somone out there whos life is double ****ed.
Im not in the best headspace at the moment, but, life management makes things easier. One management thing i picked up from work, only answer every 3rd phone call. If its important, they'll call back.
That helped me out because i took some time to just do things to take my mind away from my situation.
Not even stuff i enjoy, but things like garden maintenance, stuff like that.
Just stuff to clear the head, wrap my head things without the constant outside opinions.
Opinions are like arseholes, everybody has one. But they are all different, and not all suit the situation.

[gooseneck]

I'm not too miffed. Just got depressed 2 days ago because I forgot to take my lexapro 2 days in a row. Simple as that.

I am a bit upset at the cold weather though but its better than melting. I might buy two or three extra blankets this year for next winter and some more clothes, can never have enough clothes.

Bought a Logitech G503 gaming mouse that malfunctions and the seller won't refund me, they're worth $100 (LMB doesn't work sometimes) and started playing Fortnite about a month ago, I levelled up and I realised that about 90% of the players are cheating using macros and aimbots.

So that is a bit of a downer. I can't win a game because I'm too honest? No. Its because Fortnite is full of 12-14 year old kids who don't know how much of a dick move cheating is.

What ever happened to being ashamed of doing something? When I grew up cheating in multiplayer was a shameful thing that would get you instantly banned by moderators that were on duty but cheating in single player was ok if you wanted to just enjoy the storyline.

Cheating is so rife on fortnite that you die within minutes of hitting the ground by players who use macros to box you in then jump over the wall and instantly kill you with a single headshot.

What ever happened to being imperfect, being a human?

[sneaky]

Gooseneck - I always thought I was killed off quickly in fortnite because i'm no good at it I don't play much, usually when my son is on the xbox and we take turns death for death, lets just say his turns take a lot longer than my turns.

Jump back on the meds and hope they kick in quickly.


I had a less than productive weekend - I did make it to yoga friday and saturday to get the days off to a good start, but then got home and hid from the wind all weekend. I had things to do that I should have been in and out of the house and up and down ladders for the day. I did some ebaying to grab a few items i need. hopefully there's not as much wind next weekend and I will get something done.

[.:4:.]

Didnt get much sleep last night knowing i had a pretty full on solicitors meeting today. The meeting went well, but yeah, it was more full on then any meeting i have ever had. So i firstly do not like getting into the nitty gritty of my own financials. Secondly, disability stuff, my mum was there to fill in the timelime. I dont remember my early childhood, but still, nothing im comfortable to talk about.
My legal people are great, nothing is asked in any form of aggression. Dunno why anything is relevant.
Upon leaving my mum commented on how proffesional i dealt with the barage of heavy questions. Thats called customer service face.
She asked if i wanted to go for lunch. I said no, wasnt hungry. I actually wanted to throw up. I wasnt physically sick, it was just way too much to take in in a short period of time.

[gooseneck]

People wonder why I'm an introvert.

Its because only human beings know how to kill another human being through prolonged mental torture and torment.

**** humans.

^ Thats how I feel when I've been glutenized.

Got glutenized tonight because my mum suggested that maybe the Pauls Custard mix was the same stuff that they used in the bottled pre-made stuff. I said "no, it contains starch from wheat, see" I figured, meh maybe its ok? Maybe the starch is ok. So stupid me tried it out a few hours ago. Sure enough I feel like I just dropped a 100 pounds of paranoia and I feel like I'm going crazy.

I'm going to go and eat something which will give me diarrhea as a treament to the gluten. To try and get it out of my intestines sooner rather than later.

She does this every few months, when you've got your guard down she conveniently forgets that I've got to be on a strict gluten free diet and suggests something tasty and especially sugary for me to eat that may glutenize me. Its almost like when teenagers are deliberately made sick by their parents. I then cave in eventually, get glutenized and then lash out at her (verbally). I didn't tonight, she is asleep and I'm in my bedroom. Over the years I've found its best to stay away from others if I'm glutenized.

Listening to Garbage helps too: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4RPKqo18J4

It sucks. I'm eating a can of baked beans at the moment cause I know that they're gluten free. Couldn't find anything else to eat.

What makes things worse is she has stopped suggesting to me things that I can cook for her and has entirely left it up to me to feed her every day.

I asked her a few days ago if she likes pizza. She said yes. 12 months ago I was cooking nothing but pizza for her and she constantly suggested to me that she wanted something else to eat.

Laziest woman on planet earth with more excuses than you can poke a stick at. But she has had a rough time with her husband, my father. So. You can't blame her for how she behaves. But it still makes my life difficult.

Then there is my brother and sister. Whole other story there.

[sneaky]

not really depression related this time, more like I need somewhere to vent..

my dog hurt her leg the other day and she will need surgery to fix a cruciate ligament injury.. she is a 7yr old golden retriever so hopefully still lots of life in her.

yesterday there was no question of getting the surgery, now I still want her to get the surgery but wondering how crazy I am for spending the money required to fix a loved family member.

The normal vet ball-parked an estimate at between $5k-$10k which I can get my hands on but in the current economic climate it is getting to where I don't even feel comfortable telling close friends and family how much I'm looking at spending. We have a consult with the surgical vet tomorrow, he doesn't work Wednesdays - I assume he is sailing his giant yacht or buying another Ferrari or something.

I will ask about alternative options, but it doesn't look like there is one at the moment - seems to be surgery, carry the injury or get put down...

[DFB FGXR6]

Originally Posted by sneaky

not really depression related this time, more like I need somewhere to vent..

my dog hurt her leg the other day and she will need surgery to fix a cruciate ligament injury.. she is a 7yr old golden retriever so hopefully still lots of life in her.

yesterday there was no question of getting the surgery, now I still want her to get the surgery but wondering how crazy I am for spending the money required to fix a loved family member.

The normal vet ball-parked an estimate at between $5k-$10k which I can get my hands on but in the current economic climate it is getting to where I don't even feel comfortable telling close friends and family how much I'm looking at spending. We have a consult with the surgical vet tomorrow, he doesn't work Wednesdays - I assume he is sailing his giant yacht or buying another Ferrari or something.

I will ask about alternative options, but it doesn't look like there is one at the moment - seems to be surgery, carry the injury or get put down...

As mentioned, do what you feel is right.

I have had to shell out for some pretty big vet bills this year. One person questioned spending so much on a 7 year old dog, which I was somewhat offended by. It was not until that same person was put in similar situation that his view on the matter changed. At the time, I had to keep what was going on quite to the people around me to, trying to avoid being told that it's "only a dog". My little dog knows me better than I do sometimes, there was no way at all I wasn't going to do everything I could to make sure he would be ok. Justifying the expense to others, well they just don't understand.

[T3rminator]

Originally Posted by sneaky

not really depression related this time, more like I need somewhere to vent..

my dog hurt her leg the other day and she will need surgery to fix a cruciate ligament injury.. she is a 7yr old golden retriever so hopefully still lots of life in her.

yesterday there was no question of getting the surgery, now I still want her to get the surgery but wondering how crazy I am for spending the money required to fix a loved family member.

The normal vet ball-parked an estimate at between $5k-$10k which I can get my hands on but in the current economic climate it is getting to where I don't even feel comfortable telling close friends and family how much I'm looking at spending. We have a consult with the surgical vet tomorrow, he doesn't work Wednesdays - I assume he is sailing his giant yacht or buying another Ferrari or something.

I will ask about alternative options, but it doesn't look like there is one at the moment - seems to be surgery, carry the injury or get put down...

One thing to consider is quality of life with surgery vs non surgery. Get multiple opinions.

I had a golden retriever when I was 18. He had a tiny little lump on the roof of his mouth, vet wanted to check it out, so I let him. Turned out to be a tumor. Without any thought, I pulled out my entire life savings, and said "off you go, fix him". Whilst they successfully removed the tumor, his quality of life suffered due to chemo. Cut a long story short, 12 months later he didn't make it. His quality of life was next to zero after the operation. Before that he was a happy dog. If I had my time again I would have said, let him be until his time is up.

Sounds like your dilemma is more about what other people might think. One way to get around it is to tell family / friends that you self insured. Whats the cost to insure a dog these days? $900 a year? 900 x 7 = $6,300. And you don't have to cover any excess.

[Mr_G6ET]

Originally Posted by T3rminator

One thing to consider is quality of life with surgery vs non surgery. Get multiple opinions.

.... His quality of life was next to zero after the operation. Before that he was a happy dog. ....

good first quote, I read online after first seeing this subject was let heal vs operate. Sometimes there is recovery.
Doggy doses of Phenergan for a few weeks, like how bad is it ? As you mentioned, maybe a boat payment is due.

Look after what provides you the most.

Cold cold query but how much is a puppy ?

[Gypzy]

Originally Posted by sneaky

not really depression related this time, more like I need somewhere to vent..

my dog hurt her leg the other day and she will need surgery to fix a cruciate ligament injury.. she is a 7yr old golden retriever so hopefully still lots of life in her.

yesterday there was no question of getting the surgery, now I still want her to get the surgery but wondering how crazy I am for spending the money required to fix a loved family member.

The normal vet ball-parked an estimate at between $5k-$10k which I can get my hands on but in the current economic climate it is getting to where I don't even feel comfortable telling close friends and family how much I'm looking at spending. We have a consult with the surgical vet tomorrow, he doesn't work Wednesdays - I assume he is sailing his giant yacht or buying another Ferrari or something.

I will ask about alternative options, but it doesn't look like there is one at the moment - seems to be surgery, carry the injury or get put down...

The value of having a pet, in many cases a dog, or three! can be the difference between been here or not. Sneaky i hope your pooch is recovering well and from expierence, it will be a long and time consuming recovery but so very well worth it.
I haven't been on this forum much but often check on the recent postings. This one in particular has my interest.
2019 I would like to forget, but can't out of respect for my Dad and wife who i both lost within two months of each other. When Dad passed away in July 2019, i had already said goodbye to him while he still knew who i was and could sort of understand what i was trying to say to him. Dementia sucks.
My wife couldn't make it to Dads funeral as she had her own health issues and passed away in September 2019. Soon i reckon she'll make it rain on us and i can always relate green grass and flowering shrubs to her love of gardening.
So what got me through the last twelve months has to be our kids, that being our three dogs. To get home from work to an empty house wasn't going to sit well for me. To miss that companionship wasn't going to be any good for me either. But to get home from work and pull up at the front gate to three wagging tails was the absolute best thing that i could wish for after an absolute **** series of heart breaking events.
Having a pet to lean on for my recovery saved my life. I don't think I'd be here now if I didn't have these guys for company.

[Mr_G6ET]

I'm going to add to this thread by posting this web site:

https://adf.org.au/drug-facts/medicinal-cannabis/

Nothing more than info ... this time

[FTE217]

sneaky, in the big picture, you do what you feel is right to do, it no matter what others may think, they'd think the same with no covid by the way.
IF it makes you happy and your fam thats all that matters pal.
My Mum spent a small fortune on her cat (passed away @ 18yrs) over the years, enough for a deposit people save for a house.
You think WTF BUT thats what she wanted to do - I don't blame her one bit but the ol man used to just shake his head for I know what he preffered lol.....

[MercuryT]

Hope all going well guys and girls.

Stay positive. Life will get better.

[sneaky]

thanks for the support everyone - the surgeon's quote was at the lower end of the other vets guesstimate earlier in the week. All up I'm out of pocket about $7k including the first vet for xrays and diagnosis.. fun fact, there is a good chance the other knee will go at some point in the future as well... it sounds like the recovery won't be fun but she is expected to make full recovery and be able to do all the doggy things in a few months.

she went under the knife today, all reports from the vet are good so far.

there doesn't seem to be much of a 'let it heal' option as this leads to severe osteo arthritis.

Mr G6ET - my golden retriever was $1200. If the question on price was aimed at replace instead of fix the current one, that wasn't an option.. she is about middle age and i couldn't put her down for a sore leg... i'm middle age with sore back/hip/knees but i don't need to be put down yet

[Mr_G6ET]

Originally Posted by sneaky

thanks for the support everyone - the surgeon's quote was at the lower end of the other vets guesstimate earlier in the week. All up I'm out of pocket about $7k including the first vet for xrays and diagnosis.. fun fact, there is a good chance the other knee will go at some point in the future as well... it sounds like the recovery won't be fun but she is expected to make full recovery and be able to do all the doggy things in a few months.

she went under the knife today, all reports from the vet are good so far.

there doesn't seem to be much of a 'let it heal' option as this leads to severe osteo arthritis.

Mr G6ET - my golden retriever was $1200. If the question on price was aimed at replace instead of fix the current one, that wasn't an option.. she is about middle age and i couldn't put her down for a sore leg... i'm middle age with sore back/hip/knees but i don't need to be put down yet

Yeah, sorry for the 'joke' but fully understand, they are part of the family. The connection they have and benefit they give is priceless.
I was in a hard spot, down, but it was a new relationship with a dog that gave me constant smile.
My lady was a good half of the help but I recognised the unconditional affection from the dog helped me.

Again, sorry for the cold joke, my dad would cane me

[sneaky]

Mr G6ET - no offence taken at all. It is a fair question to ask and part of the reason I asked my dog crazy friend for advice, nothing like skewing the results to hear the answer I want.

Puppy is back home and adjusting to the idea of not being allowed to free roam the house and yard as she pleases. My other dog is being a pain in the butt so he might get a holiday at my parents to allow the retriever to recover in peace - it would just be me and the patient for a week.

Wish I could swing carers leave for the week to care for the dog. I’m already feeling the stress of acting in a higher position at work while I just want to be looking after the dog.

My last shrink appointment was trying to focus on spending some money on myself, stop living like I’m poor and enjoy some of my hard earned. That theory has now been put on hold. I have also had the mortgage broker doing her maths for me and trying to work a new car into the mix, I might have to give her a call and cancel that idea for the moment - I’ll sort the mortgage and forget the car as it wasn’t a necessity.

[Mr_G6ET]

Originally Posted by sneaky

Mr G6ET - no offence taken at all. It is a fair question to ask and part of the reason I asked my dog crazy friend for advice, nothing like skewing the results to hear the answer I want.

Puppy is back home and adjusting to the idea of not being allowed to free roam the house and yard as she pleases. My other dog is being a pain in the butt so he might get a holiday at my parents to allow the retriever to recover in peace - it would just be me and the patient for a week.

Wish I could swing carers leave for the week to care for the dog. I’m already feeling the stress of acting in a higher position at work while I just want to be looking after the dog.

My last shrink appointment was trying to focus on spending some money on myself, stop living like I’m poor and enjoy some of my hard earned. That theory has now been put on hold. I have also had the mortgage broker doing her maths for me and trying to work a new car into the mix, I might have to give her a call and cancel that idea for the moment - I’ll sort the mortgage and forget the car as it wasn’t a necessity.

Good to hear the patient is back home, mission complete.
I suggest the focus on thinking of 'you' is still valid, its not always about money.

[sneaky]

well I realised last night that I had forgotten to take my zoloft for a few days and I haven't noticed any side effects.. My morning routine has changed slightly and I have been more concerned with sorting out the dog tablets, also I stopped taking hay fever tablets (swapped to nose spray) so I haven't woken up reaching for those tablets.