Things people just shouldn't.. and i mean SHOULDN'T have said...

[fordZ]

"Higher octane fuel screws ya piston rings".

From some retard in my IT class at school. Realised what shit had dribbled out of his mouth onto the ground after he said it and tried to cover it up but didn't.

[santoitaliano]

my favourites are storys about little performance mods that require no additional parts, and gain **rwkw... u no.. the ones the factory didnt know about..

funny that.. millions of dollars in production design and development, but if they turn that magical screw half a turn counterclockwise it turns "my cuzin's suzuki baleno in 2 d biggest v8 eatin monsta" end quote

Whyyyyy don't i ever meet these people's cousins..

thought of a few today, seeing my mates face reminded me.. i forgot them all though..

[niko]

in my car once:
guy: this car's mad is it a commodore?
me: FORD MAN,
guy: ohh its really nice
me: hahahahahha

[AlbertM]

When I just got my EB my friend asked me if I had drilled the injectors out for more power.

[niko]

at carwash once:

revin at 3500 but tapping so its bouncing around at that rpm

some guy: is u got a v8 man??
me: nah only a 6 with catback "wink"

[danege]

Love these threads.

Back when i was at school we had a mate who "had this hotted up corolla". He kept telling us that it was the 20valve "rally pack model". So were like "cool, can you prove that?".

He brings the car round and first thing we notice is that this is the most basic, poverty pack CL(i think that was the model) 1986 corolla that we have ever seen.

So we pop the bonet and first thing we notice is the 12/16(cant remember) valve engine staring at us.

He also kept telling us that he could get from his house (at the beach) to school (bout a 40k drive) in....10 MINUITES. and only half of that 50k's is actually 100km an hour highway.


Needless to say he was good for entertainment when we were at school.

[Danny]

Oh K Heres another couple.

Mate: "I drove a Astra from Werribee to to Kew once without a timing belt. It made a ticking noise. Then we had to rebuild it."

Random ******** In year 10: "My auntie let me do burnouts in her Court in her Dodge Viper"

[santoitaliano]

my mate.. keep in mind nobody has seen or heard of this car that he is supposedly getting...

My VY S-pak Supercharged has 171kw.. but thats on normal petrol (keep in mind from factory u r recommend to run at premium all the time).. but when i pump in optimax it pumps out 225!

[niko]

LOL dont u just love these ppl!

[santoitaliano]

best was that he was tellin every1 that it pumped out 195kw... until antoher friend brought in a spec sheet..

[Bossxr8]

I remember giving my GF and a few of her friends a ride once in my EB 5 litre when one of them said "this is a V8 yeah" to which I replied "yeah", when he replied back "its a VN isn't it". Me and my GF both cracked up.

[dogbreath_48]

Man i've heard so much of this bullshit...

at a 'party' type thing once, this dude was trying to talk cars with me and AU-Steve. We let alot of bs slip...
then he was checking out Steves car. first asked what the amp in the boot was.
"it's an amp, man"

then he walked down and looked in the drivers window. pointing at the boost guage; "is that your blow off valve?"

this bloke also tried telling us private schools buy good VCE scores off the government. thet's why they're expensive...

Danm, wish i could remember more!


-Stu

p.s.: THIS thread discusses in depth this phenomeon in deapth. got reminded of it here.

[niko]

i love it when u overhear/talk to someone bout car stuff and they explain everything to u as if they memorised the spec sheet or some detailed car magazine, then i think to myself should i ask them wat it means? nah more fun this way

[mcflux]

I once stopped quickly at a mate's place, and while I was there him & his mate were playing Colin McRae on the PS. Anyhoo, when I went to leave & started up the car (it has a digital dash), this guy's mate goes "ooh! your car has a damage indicator!" (he was looking at the car image on the dash which lights up the doors/boot/fuel cap if any of these are open)

A mate (actually, the one above who I went to visit) claims he beat a VY Clubby in his parents' stock ED (Fairmont I6 auto). "It was at an uphill set of lights and I had the outside corner"

-Dave-

[MO]

I had a car once that was so fast it beat the crap out of your black cat!

[Pik0]

Originally Posted by Ghia5L

, this guy's mate goes "ooh! your car has a damage indicator!" (he was looking at the car image on the dash which lights up the doors/boot/fuel cap if any of these are open
-Dave-

THATS GOLD!!!

[niko]

taxi driver once explained to me how some guy took a **** in his back seat, he goes if i see him again i run him over fkn

[Brnesy]

got a friend whos got a rav 4 with stupidly loud zorst

a kid comes up to him and asks him how he fitted a v8 in to it :P

[Lukeyson]

not car related, but my brother inlaw is a bit stoooopid. And me and my father in law were giving him a hard time, and father in law says to him 'boy are you deaf, dumb, and stupid?' and instantly he goes 'both'
we still **** ourselfs laughing when we bring it up

[DRU842]

Perhaps the GT4 print adverts that have the Typhoon as a V6?

[niko]

omg i cant beleive that amount of times i get asked if my car is a "v6", STRAIGHT 6 damit! lol

its even easier to say 6 rather than v6

[OZ-E 5.0L]

hade a customer come in with no front brake pads.
me. what happend to ur pads
> I was in a hurry to pick the kids up from school & dident have time,
but now i cant get the pads in at all ( kids r in the car ,pistons hanging out of the callaper )

[Donut Queen]

My sister managed to convince my little brother that poking bruises as much as you can helps them heal faster lol

[lotsy]

A mate of mines little sister had a boy from her class calling at all hours of the night when her mum asked about the boy she relpied 'it's all right mum he's medicated'..

[Blue Oval Mopar Man]

Originally Posted by MickyB

Thats what I was about to post. Hmm, :

A girl who I went to high school with who had some very nice assets once asked me if 'cleavage' was part of a car. WTF!!

Yeah , hey mickey ! I have a 351 cleavage in my XD ! :

[jjjr6]

Once I pulled into a Hungry Jacks to get food and the manager was having a smoke, next to his WRX. I was on my motorbike (R6).

Manager: mate is that the new R1?
Me: nah mate it’s a 99 and it has R6 stickers on it. (was in 2002)
Manager: I ran my mate’s R1 at calder and beat him
Me: so your rex runs like 10 seconds?
Manager: dunno man, didn’t look at the time
Me: you should have – you’ve got one of the fastest rex’s in the country mate (at the time rigoli’s had just cracked 9’s)
Manager: yeah well it has boost and a cooler
Me: they have cooler’s stock you know? And how come they let you on the strip at the same time as a bike? Calder don’t do that……...
Manager: gotta get back to work – nice bike man

[Twisted]

Originally Posted by jjjr6

Once I pulled into a Hungry Jacks to get food and the manager was having a smoke, next to his WRX. I was on my motorbike (R6).

Manager: mate is that the new R1?
Me: nah mate it’s a 99 and it has R6 stickers on it. (was in 2002)
Manager: I ran my mate’s R1 at calder and beat him
Me: so your rex runs like 10 seconds?
Manager: dunno man, didn’t look at the time
Me: you should have – you’ve got one of the fastest rex’s in the country mate (at the time rigoli’s had just cracked 9’s)
Manager: yeah well it has boost and a cooler
Me: they have cooler’s stock you know? And how come they let you on the strip at the same time as a bike? Calder don’t do that……...
Manager: gotta get back to work – nice bike man

Haha thats classic!

[MrQuan]

Had a maths teacher in high school called Wayne Anchor.
Teachers used to have an little engraved sign on their desk, his would've been "Mr. W. Anchor". His was never in sight! haha

[Casper]

I've lost count of the number of times I've been told a 6 can NEVER beat a V8.
I remember one from a few years a go (when I had my XD..it was a manual 6 and not exactly slow), it went something like this (give or take)
Him: A V8 would kill it.
Me: why?
Him: Cause its a V8 (or something of that nature)
Me: So say a 6 had 250kw and a V8 had 120kw, the V8 would still win?
Him: Of course, its a V8.

How do you argue with that?

[MrQuan]

Originally Posted by Casper

How do you argue with that?

With a heavy object? Just a suggestion it: